1 Who are you?
My name is Esther Walker. I'm a journalist and I live in North London, where I've always lived except for an unpleasant 2 year mistake in West London. I only went to a private school for my A-Levels, so please don't call me "posh". And I went to Bristol University and shitpiled my degree in English Literature, so don't call me "clever". I used to work in newspaper offices. Now I am a freelance journalist (i.e. unemployed) and I write this blog, with occasional contrbutions by Emelie Frid, who is editor-at-large.
2 Why do you write this blog? It's not like there's a shortage of food blogs.
I'm glad you asked me that. I started this blog when no-one would commission me and at a time when it felt like newspapers weren't going to exist in a year - although to be honest it kind of always feels like that because journalists are so paranoid and fatalistic.
Everyone else seemed to be doing a blog and so I thought I'd do one. It was about food really quite by accident. I just started writing about it, but it could have been about anything. I try to be earnest about cooking but I seem to end up writing about other stuff. You might occasionally see my name in a newspaper or magazine and be confused as to why I'm not writing about food; it's because I'm not a food journalist.
3 Yes I've noticed that you don't seem to know anything about food or appear to be a very good cook
No, I don't and no I'm not. I'm just trying to make you laugh, pal.
4 Aren't you just taking this piss? Is this whole thing a joke? Do the recipes actually work?
I AM taking the piss, but no the "whole thing" isn't a joke and yes the recipes work. If you make one and it doesn't work, email me.
5 Why don't you ever cook fish?
Because I don't think anyone ought to be encouraged to eat fish. Also, my nearest trustworthy fishmonger is in Hampstead and anyone who's ever tried getting from Kentish Town to Hampstead will tell you that it's like Hampstead was designed to be inaccessible from Kentish Town by foot, public transport and car.
6 Are you married to Giles Coren?
7 What's your favourite restaurant?
Jin Kichi Japanese grill in Hampstead - even though it's hell to get to. If you want to eat there, ring at 3.15pm on the day you want to go and ask to sit at the bar. 020 7794 6158. Have the seaweed salad and then only realise when the bill comes that it costs SEVEN POUNDS. Closed on Mondays.
7 So you're just some spoilt fat North London housewife doing this as a way to pass the time? I bet you only got this blog because of Giles. Loser!!!
Steady on. I'm not that fat. Anyone can write a blog and I don't make money from it. I'm sure a lot of my readers are Giles' fans and they're all very welcome here.
9 Why are you so depressed and anxious all the time? I'm sick of your whining
I know, I'm sorry about it. I should really be a bit more positive but I think it's funny and theraputic for everyone if I talk a lot about failure.
10 You used to reply to all the comments on your blog but you don't anymore. It can't be because you're too busy because you keep saying you're unemployed.
I don't reply to all the comments anymore because it's TOO MUCH FUN. I am unemployed but there's laundry to be done and cookbooks to be looked at and tidying up and opening post and stuff. If I replied to all the comments as often as I'd like, to a length I'd like, I'd just end up sitting in my house surrounded by piles of laundry and unopened post. I mean, you wouldn't really be able to tell the difference, but I need the illusion of efficiency - okay?
11 Why did you reject my comment at moderation?
Because you somehow managed in that moment to annoy me, for a reason that at a later date I probably couldn't justify. But, surefire ways of getting rejected are: revealing the identity of someone I have written about, whose identity I don't want revealed; being mean about my husband; being snide about the amount of times I refer to my husband; pointing out mean things that have been written about my husband in the paper; pointing out spelling mistakes; linking to a porn site.
12 I think you suck
That's cool. I can dig that. See Orangette, Eat Like a Girl or Food Stories for a proper food blog